Display for Critique II

[Smoke]

This display at the same venue.

Maybe this one has some better attributes?


Keep in mind that when offering advice on how to improve a display focus on what can be changed and what can not be changed.

For instance the curtains are part of the stage and therefore will always be part of any display here unless the bulding burns down.

The space alotted for each display is what it is.

Let up understand that a display will always look better in front of a suitable backdrop and will improve dramatically when given more space. In the case of these diplays we can't change that so what "can" be changed to improve them.

 

[Ang3lfir3]

typing on phone while Vic drives .... so cut me some slack please

again do we know the name of the display or intent of the person setting up the display .... I will assume the tree can't be changed and will go from there

1) scroll is wrong for the tree ... and the season .... early spring late winter has past
2) companion pot is kind of meh (whats with all the blue companion pots?) its not outrageously horrible but i would prefer something less flashy ... its distracting
3) personally prefer the the tree in a nan-ban (ok you can't change that right now)
4) scroll is way too close the tree for this scroll

I think the perfect scroll here for me would be of a lone dragon fly maybe a few blades of grass (i wouldn't mind the redundancy in this case)

the companion prolly could be different ... i think i would like something more along the lines of a small flowering alpine plant with a simple tiny blossom ... maybe even a small wild thyme azalea might look pleasing with say one or two late blossoms

 

[grouper52]

It takes visual/mental work to keep focused on the scroll, which is the only attractive thing in sight. Something light and spring-like for both tree and accent might work. Once the tree is replaced, have it sent to someone up here to be rehabilitated into something that actually looks like a tree.

 

[dick benbow]

I'm thinking i'd like to see a flat board used under the tree as opposed to a stand. the tree is so tall, that i'd like the pot to give the appearance of being firmly anchored to the ground. technically, a bird on a tree limb is a bit redundant to me in the scroll as the bonsai is a tree so there is somewhat a duplication. maybe i've been "studying" too long in shohin display circles, but i like the contrast in colors between the grass and pot as demonstrated with the companion plant. smoke, thank-you for making the effort to get these things started.
"good on you! "

let's keep this rollin' with more additions

 

[rockm]

Scroll is inappropriate, I think, as it presents another tree. It's redundant. The tree's pot is a bit "off" visually, something a little shallower, less cramped and more informal would work better.

I don't understand what the display is going for visually or emotionally. It would seem to be talking about spring, with the flowering tree in the scroll, but uses an evergreen as the primary display--which could connote winter... The accent appears to be pretty much of an afterthought...

 

[tmmason10]

The pine is too rugged for the graceful scroll. It looks like it should be in the mountains, so probably should have been displayed with a suiseki stone or at least had mountains in the scroll for me.

Also, the apex looks like the head an alien from the alien vs. predator movies.

 

[Fangorn]

The first thing I see when I look at this display is the scroll, and in my opinion it is too "flashy" for this tree. It also bothers me that it's leaning towards the bonsai and the branch in the scroll is sticking into the tree. I think something understated like a soft moon or sun would be better and like tmmason10 said, I think a smooth suiseki stone would be better as an accent. I like the idea of this tree hanging over a shore on a lake or ocean
For the record, this opinion is from someone could be called deficient in the art of displaying trees and I'd like to thank Smoke for putting these threads up here.