2022 Fall Haiku Contest - now until November 30!

[vancehanna]

First blossom opens bees will dance
A crickets symphony
Is commencing.

 

[Vali]

Tree gets protected
The winter can't hurt it
Here comes the rabbit

 

[Rivian]

Bending the rules now
Haikus can be what I want
Shorten the first line

 

[sorce]

One must love raking.
Crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch.
Time for composting.

Sorce

 

[Coppersdad]

leafless trees nearby
make shadows on the shutters
promise spring to come

sunlight and water
time passing very slowly
possibilities

fall is depressing
cold wet, shadows sleeping trees
new growth far away

silhouette branches
reaching up for sky sun cloud
never to reach them

 

[mj_barb]

Give me all the tools
Probably don’t need these tools
But alas, snip snip

 

[Neo_Rokkenjima]

If the winner is selected at random, doesn't that technically make this a haiku lottery, rather than a contest? Food for thought!
In any case, I could use the the scissors. Let's see if any of my old pieces hold up.

ORIGINAL [ENG]:

“Cutting autumn wind//
Dancing between falling leaves//
Winter draws closer.”

JP VER:

葉が落ちる
“Ha ga ochiru”
剣の間で踊る
“Ken no made odoru”
冬近く
“Fuyu chikaku”

ENG TL of JP VER
(Does not conform to the rules of haiku)

“Leaves fall//
Dancing through the swords//
Near winter”

In this case, I may like the Japanese version more than the original. Will post more if there is interest.

 

[ShadyStump]

Will post more if there is interest.

There is.

 

[Neo_Rokkenjima]

There is.

Alright then, here’s the second half of that previous haiku. On that note, yes, the previous haiku was actually the first half of a two-part set which I wrote for my girlfriend— and she deserves special credit for having inspired this haiku in particular, which I personally consider to be among my better haiku. As the poem continues, Autumn has passed, and the worst of the changing seasons has come and gone.

ORIGINAL ENG:

“The jolly deer plays//
in the sunkissed mountain snow//
Pure and radiant”

JP VER:

鹿が遊ぶ
“Shika ga asobu”
無邪気と輝く
“Mujaki to kagayaku”
雪の中
“Yuki no naka”


ENG TL FROM JP VER
(Does not conform to the rules of haiku)

“Deer is playing//
Innocent and shining//
In the snow.”

Unlike the previous haiku, I prefer the original English version, rather than the Japanese version. It’s not like the Japanese version is “bad” or anything, I just prefer the expressiveness of English here. There’s also a debate to be had about whether “mujaki” should be pronounced as two syllables or three, and I tend to get hung up on these little rules when deciding my preferences. I could surely use a different adjective, but then the original meaning would be lost.

 

[ShadyStump]

debate to be had about whether “mujaki” should be pronounced as two syllables or three,

I imagine that regional dialect/accent play a big part here, but then you obviously know more about speaking Japanese than I do. I just watch Midnight Diner on Netflix over and over again.
Still, there are many words in American English that suffer the same debate, and we all just accept that there's plenty enough poetic license to accommodate most pronunciations.

I have to say, you make me a bit jealous and self conscious. 2 years of my life in the middle east, and I never learned enough Arabic to get through the airport alone, much less engage in that incredible poetry tradition.
Hats off to you.

 

[Mississippi]

Roses red
Violets blue
Hope I’m better at bonsai
Than haiku

 

[penumbra]

Roses red
Violets blue
Hope I’m better at bonsai
Than haiku

I'd say you just about have to be.

 

[Neo_Rokkenjima]

I imagine that regional dialect/accent play a big part here, but then you obviously know more about speaking Japanese than I do. I just watch Midnight Diner on Netflix over and over again.
Still, there are many words in American English that suffer the same debate, and we all just accept that there's plenty enough poetic license to accommodate most pronunciations.

I have to say, you make me a bit jealous and self conscious. 2 years of my life in the middle east, and I never learned enough Arabic to get through the airport alone, much less engage in that incredible poetry tradition.
Hats off to you.

My brother, you flatter me! I’m glad you enjoyed my poetry, but I don’t deserve such a great credit. Even for a person who is pretty unskilled in Japanese, such as myself, haiku is an easy format for poetry. As long as you have the vocabulary, it is hard to write enough to where grammar mistakes would even be noticeable, let alone unforgivable.

Now, as for Arabic... That is a very beautiful, but also very difficult language. You shouldn’t besmirch your ability to learn because you simply didn’t learn it when you could have. Besides that, if you should choose to learn it, then you certainly still have the time to do so.

 

[cockroach]

Bnuts watch their trees
Autumn colors, falling leaves
Planning Springs new work

Summer canopies
Turn to winter silhouette
Sip hot tea and stare

 

[TomRVA]

Rusty PlaySkool Scissors
Certainly Hacking Up My Tree
Fresh New Pair for Spring?

 

[bluone23]

I go up the hill
See the old twisted tree
Wiggle wiggle take it home

 

[Zac]

I guess I'll try this contest out here it goes.


First frost glistening on me
I'm. So sad to see
My colorful leaves leaving me

 

[ShadyStump]

 

[Mikecheck123]

trees insanely high

sway above me as i make

noise raking leaves

 

[Smysgma]

Lake Merritt bonsai
Playing non-stop in my head
Urging me to try


Storm strips the leaves
Building a carpet below
Colors gone too soon