curious to know what native Virginia species the local folks have tried, what has been successful and what you’d recommend avoiding
If you read enough about our native species here, you'll figure out the majority of them are swamp/wet/lowland type species, which to me means prone to die back. Also, fungus is a way of life here...
Itea, ilex verticillata, glabra, opaca, wax myrtle, birch, aronia (chokeberry), witch hazel...
Mountain laurel might be cool and grows wild up there, also the native rhodo.
Some of the native viburnums may be interesting to try, all viburnums for the most part do well here, but you might be too cold for some to be unprotected.
Our native tree species aren't that exciting really: Red maple, all of the oaks, elms, erc, white pine, loblolly. You might be able to find a cool Virginia pine. Tulip poplar, beech, sycamore...
Sweetgum may be viable. The native winged elms seem pretty nice (yours should do well here). I have a few, and they get the very pronounced corking on all wood and eventually mature into plates. Some sweetgum around here also has the corky winged growth. Maybe black gum. Hornbeams definitely.
I'm missing a lot for sure, this is just off the top of my head.. Hopefully some other local people will chime in about which natives may or may not have potential.
Welcome to Virginia!